The same old blackboard, the same old
off-white tube light and that same old small room stuffed in with more students
than double of its humble appetite... everything was just the way it used to be
but the only thing perhaps that stood out n screamed out “Yes, this is
awkward!! And yes I am pretty freaked out! “ was me!
]
Standing beside the blackboard of our
local maths tutor, for them I was the one of those few iitians that made it
through jee out of our small state Tripura and I was asked to address the guys
back in our place to talk about iit, about iit life, iit preparation and stuffs
of the same sort. Before I move on to tell you guys about the evening I would
like to tell you about a flash back. ( take it as one of those extra black n
white flash back within flash backs that we get to see in movies!:D )
Back as kid of 9th or 10th
iit was every like that big dream of people who everyone talks about and is
really crazy about. IITians were like celebrities who didn’t just prove
themselves to be stronger, sharper and of a much higher intellect than others
but just the way they discuss ideas, strategize a solution, their ways of
attacking exotic problems and their motivations and passion… well, it all used
to come together to create this exotic species of an iitian for us. We never
used to have big coaching institutes and in a small town like Agartala, the few
iitians every year used to be very much in the headlines… So we all wanted to
be like them, be one amongst them… and the big stage used to be when they were
called by tutors to give address the
aspirants. It used to be like the whole batch looks up to you. I can’t
tell you how many times we had thought of this day in our heads… the day we get
called by our tutors to give our very ‘own gues lecture’.
So yeah, it was pretty big for me but
things had changed since then. I was the same old me after all. Going out,
seeing the world, being amongst other iitians, friends, people and strangers
had changed my thinking a lot. As a student I used to be much more passionate
than motivated. Problems were more important then marks and ranks. And even
though I did make it to IIT I would always regret of letting go of my
‘physicsified’ dreams and how I should have been a physics student than an
engineering celebrity at our small town.
I looked back at them and started
interacting. I did get the same type of questions that every IITian gets at
this point… How is it inside IIT, which all topics should they concentrate on
more, what are the so called ‘tricks’ to solve objectives, how much time to
devote on different subjects…. So on and so forth.
I did try my best to help them out but
somewhere deep inside I did feel a little disheartened. It was like a big bunch
of people who were there to somehow prove themselves, ‘show the world’ how much
strong and sharp they are. They we competitive, motivated but hey, I still did
wonder though… where is the passion?? Before being an iit aspirant they were
all science students. None of them asked me which topic I really liked… of why
the gravitational law holds the way it holds... what causes it to happen, what
is the physical realization of ‘ ...i ‘, why really does the position and
momentum cannot be simultaneously defined….. nothing like that… I did try a
couple of times to change the track from ‘madness for iit’ to the ‘ mad world
of science’ but the hilarious and at times ‘weird’ comments did somehow used
work its way back to the old track…
“what’s the point of doing
permutations… problems take a long time to be solved in exam”
“Yes, but rotational mechanics need not
to be covered this time. Many questions have come last year so this time we can
bail out”
“Why fluctuating electric fields give
rise to magnetic fields… c’mon… Faraday’s law says so! “
So yeah, it was kind of weird in it’s
own way but how could I help it. They were all caucht in this etenal wave of
trying to prove to the world how strong and sharp they have become. But I guess
at times It’s important to stop looking at the world out there and look at
ourselves from our own eyes… look at our abilities and and our mistakes,
discover our own ways to look at things and overcome the closed doors….
At times its not really about trying to
compete with the world but to compete with the one you were a second ago.
But
too bad I wasn’t able to convey our message to the other side. All that I could
do was stand back and stare helplessly as I watched all those young talented
guys caught in the eternal wave that only runs towards the madness of the
artificial world of marks, ranks and status…
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